From Insecure Volunteer To Confident CEO + 7 Life Lessons

Growing up, I always felt I wasn’t good enough.

And when you always have to prove something, you’re never free.

It took me 34 years to finally accept myself.

Here’s my story and the lessons I learned along the way.

When I was 19, I left my home in Germany and moved to Scotland. All boys had to spend a year in service to society. I got one of 1,000 places abroad. I spent a year living and working as a volunteer in a care home.

Working in service of others changed me.

I needed to put others first. Understand that no one owed me anything. Working with people who needed my help forced me out of my comfort zone.

Leaving home allowed me to explore who I wanted to become.

I discovered that I had a fire burning inside me. A fire to become my best self. But I didn’t understand why?

I spent years chasing titles, doing things that would impress others. Never fulfilled, always searching.

Then I started writing online in March 2021.

I explored what was driving me and finally admitted to myself that I was insecure. I placed other people’s expectations on a pedestal above my own happiness. And as long as I was doing that, I could not become the person my family and business needed.

When you finally drag your inner demons to the light, they lose their power.

I now understand the fire in me is the desire to serve the people around me. To be a beacon of inspiration to my children. To be a compassionate CEO for the company I have the honour to lead.

I hope the life lessons I learned on my journey will help you:

Life Lesson 1: You are 10x more resilient than society makes you believe

Growing up a single child, suddenly living in a household of 10 was a shock.

Leaving home and living in a different country was a shock.

Caring for someone other than myself was a shock.

I had a choice: adapt or leave.

I realised that we’re more resilient than society makes us believe.

You can cope with little sleep. You can cope with working 14 hour days. You can cope with giving without knowing what the payoff will be.

When you cultivate resiliency, your growth has no limits.

Life Lesson 2: Listen to your intuition

We’re taught to analyse at school, check the facts, run the numbers. But in life you need to listen to your inner voice. Your gut is smarter than your brain.

It will keep you safe. It will guide you.

Within 45 minutes of arriving in Scotland, I met a girl I fell in love with. Everybody said it wouldn’t last. That we were too young. But we knew. We were soul-mates.

We have been married for 11 years now, have five kids with a sixth one due any day now.

Life Lesson 3: Do what scares you - escape the comfort zone

Leaving my childhood home was scary. Working with people needing my support was scary. Studying in a foreign country was scary.

Being interviewed to become the CEO of a multi-million $ company was scary.

But when you embrace the discomfort. When you lean into it, you find a whole new life waiting for you on the other side.

I faced my fears and made a new home in a foreign country. I grew as a person and appreciated being able to help others. I discovered I love learning. I got a job that fulfils me.

What’s waiting for you?

Life Lesson 4: Build discipline

At home, your parents tell you what you need to do. In school, your teachers tell you. But in life?

If you don’t learn to lead yourself, you won’t go far.

And the secret to leading yourself is building discipline. My family needs a strong, fit and healthy dad. Discipline fuels my morning workouts.

My business needs a hard-working and passionate CEO. Discipline fuels my late night work sessions.

I need to grow as a person. Discipline fuels my self-reflection.

Life Lesson 5: Always have a next mission

Setting goals is essential in life. Goals will keep you on track to achieve your life’s mission. But what happens when you reach your goals? Time to celebrate?

I crashed hard a few years back.

I finished my PhD, we had our fourth baby and I got through a 52-hour crucible event I trained years for.

But I had nothing lined up after it.

I was lost.

I should have focused on my new career more.

I should have focused on becoming a better dad.

I should have focused on being there for my wife more.

Don’t make my mistake and always have a next mission planned.

Life Lesson 6: Live a life of service

My friends all earn more money than me. Some 3x as much, others 10x. But I get paid differently. I run an organisation serving some of the more vulnerable in society.

Seeing the joy our work brings with it, is priceless.

Our mission at work is bigger than ourselves. My work is bigger than me.

And with purpose, comes a strength and inner peace providing you with something more than money: Happiness.

Life Lesson 7: In your 20s say yes, in your 30s learn to say no

When I was in my 20s I said yes to everything. Kids? Yes. Bachelor, Master, Phd? Yes. Take on more responsibility at work? Yes. That is the right approach in your 20s. Build your knowledge and experience.

But in your 30s, you need to learn to say no. Saying yes to more things also means saying yes to less time. Learn to say no to focus on what is truly important:

Family, your health, your happiness.

It’s now been 16 years since I left home. The life I have today is beyond anything I could have imagined. My life as an adult has always been in the service of others.

And I have found the more you give, the more luck you create for yourself.