Behind Closed Doors - Get Your Popcorn Ready

Meet the hero of this story: my wife. A saint in yoga pants. Always putting others’ needs first.

The setting: A Scottish stone cottage. Built to withstand a tornado of wild kids, screams and laughter.

When you walk in the door, mind your step. Coats, boots, toothpaste (no lid of course) and yes even mummy’s AirPods are all over the floor.

Good luck finding a free coat hook.

Actually, just dump it with the other stuff.

Navigating through the corridors we catch a glimpse of my wife cleaning up one of the kids' bedrooms for the 9th time today.

I don't know where she finds the energy for that. 37 weeks pregnant and all?!?

Entering the living room, our black Labrador joyfully greets you. I know he is large for his breed, right?

"Ok, Texas, bed...bed!"

Welcome to my domain: the kitchen. Dishes, cooking and the backdrop to many zoom calls.

Why is this mine? Because not too much thinking is involved here. Food plan is on the wall, the dishes have their home (unless the kids decide to 'tidy up').

My wife is doing the hard job.

She is keeping track of everybody and everything:

• Playdates

• Shopping list

• Doctor appointments

• Gifts to get for 50+ people (one for Christmas and one for their birthdays)

• And the most horrendous task of them all: laundry. Every day, at least two machine loads

So you want to come for a meal? Be prepared.

You need to be fast. Well depending on what’s on offer.

Pancakes with bacon and maple syrup? You’ll go hungry. The wolves are out.

Soup? You’ll get plenty. Both food and moans. Yes, just a half bowl can take 70mins. You'll see!

Bedtime. At least that's the plan.

Everybody has been busy all day. School, judo, and a walk. The kids will be exhausted, even begging for bed. Right?

Ever heard of getting a second wind?

Well, it’s here.

Bedtime is code in this house for: Partytime.

Walking down the corridor you will hear at least three different styles of music. Well, some of that is just noise.

Btw, however long you think getting ready for bed should take, multiply it by ten. Life could be so easy...

Finally, the kids are in bed.

Now the last round of cleaning starts.

From the front door to the kitchen and everywhere in between. You will be amazed at what lives on our floors. It’s usually not a pleasant surprise.

Done? Done! Time to wind down.

Oh wait, did you hear that? Somebody is up.

Now, after one more story has been read, both parents’ backs are properly broken, now it is time to chill.

What should we talk about? I think I miss the kids not being around.

It is crazy, it is chaos, it is a never-ending cleaning-cooking-tidying flywheel.

But we love it.

It is a house filled with laughter, love and our purpose.

It makes us strive to become better every day. Because our kids deserve it. And we would do it all over again.