11 Years Of Marriage Advice

I got married aged 23 to my first girl-friend. Now 11 years later, these are the 11 lessons I would give myself if I could go back.

1. Put your partner first

You have lofty goals for your life, I get it.

But when you give first and do not expect anything in return, your home life will be solid.

That is the foundation to build your dreams on.

2. Dream together

Remember when you first got together? You had dreams, right?

Never stop building a better future in your minds. Together. Then act.

3. Date nights

Over time you don’t need them anymore. You know each other. WRONG!

You make space for work, zoom calls and meeting clients. But you don’t have one evening per week for the love of your life?

4. Arguments

Don’t.

5. Being Right

Does it matter what time the flight is to go on vacation or what colour the carpet is?

Then, when the big decisions come about you don’t need to fight them, but your partner will listen to you.

6. Develop together

You will have your own hobbies, tastes and friends.

But share your learnings, share your new interests. Allow your partner to grow with you. Otherwise you will grow apart.

7. Friendship

You may not start out as best friends, but let your partner become it.

8. Kindness

Random acts and lots of them. Big, small and anything in between. Surprise your partner when they least expect it.

9. Look after yourself

Your mental and physical health will determine how much you can give to your partner. Maximise it. They are worth it.

10. Legacy

The way you treat your partner is what your kids will expect from their relationships. How do you want to see them being treated?

11. Your rock

Everything in your world is based on the rock of your relationship. Don’t take it for granted ever. Your house can easily collapse without its foundations, or it can weather the storm.